Sex and Love, Which One Is More Dominant? (Danny Kojima)

What do you think about sex? What do you feel about sex? Why we love sex more than anything to fulfill our pleasure? It’s all happened in your brain.

Men, women, teenager, or even animal love sex, but do we always think about sex? Actually it’s different part of the brain, but we will learn more about the part why our brain want to have sex, and how hormones can affect us to having sex.

Love…the first thing we should know is love. What is love actually? Love is something that live around us. Even children do know what love is. Even if love makes you suffer, or makes you happy, love is what’s mean to us as human.

We’re different with animal who do anything with their instinct, but they still have love to love their child. We as human also love everyone, and that’s what makes us want to care about them or even discipline them.

So, which one control us? Love or sexual desire? We will try to discuss it now.

First thing is about sex. So my class watched the documentary titled, ‘Brain Sex’. Yeah we have to review it, and anything. But the thing is that, our brain always want to try the possibilities to having sex, either it’s men, or women. You can watch this film in YouTube, and you can understand the whole meaning of your brain when you’re thinking about sex.

Brain actually have some way to distinguish things that not related to sex, or it is related, but we don’t want to took care about it. For the example, we can attracted by someone because of it’s sexy scent called pheromone. We also already discuss this pheromone before. The point is, if we smell someone’s pheromone, we can have a sexual desire for that person’s pheromone, but if we smell our relatives pheromone, we will smell it very sting and our brain try to not to take care about that smell. So our brain, have the ability to choose which one is the best for us, even we never think about it before.

But recent studies showed us that, voice, pheromone, is affected to the beautiful face. It’s different than when women is in ovulating days. The difference is that, if some women have a sexy voice, or even sexy smell, they also have beautiful face and sexy body. So that’s why someone could fall in love only because of their voice from the phone or they smell the pheromones.

Well, that would make us a little confuse isn’t it. But that is the brain thinking about sex, so how about love itself?

What do you think about love? Maybe you could say that love is beautiful, you care about someone, you think about someone, you would do anything for that someone. But do you also know that love also makes you want to discipline someone, want to say to someone that he/she is wrong?

Like our discussion before about love and intimacy, love divided by 6,eros, ludus, storge, mania, pragma, and agape.

The best love of all is agape, when you love someone without take something for granted. Yes, that is when we try to discipline our kid, trying to teach them while we are their teacher, or maybe we want to tell them something. That is agape, when they already grown up, we don’t want anything to take from them, we want them to be succeed, while we give everything the best that we can and we’re not taking any granted from them.

So, what is the difference between love and sex? Sex is your natural desire that you want to make offsprings, no matter with what. You will find the perfect one who can bear your seed or who can give you seed. You will try to find the preetiest, sexiest, even the hottest person that you can get, only for your offspring. But you will not have any commitment, you will betray another only for sex, and you will do anything to make sex.

While love is your natural conscience. You try to thinking of someone else, no matter how far they are, you will try to make that someone become better, and you will do anything for that someone. Love is that you will not think about who will bear your seed, or who will take care of your child.

So which one is better or maybe more dominant? Sex may become more dominant than love, because it’s our desire, but it’s how we manage which one go first, sex, or love. So love in the first sight is nothing more than sexual desire that our brain told us, it’s not the real love. That’s how our brain works.

28 November 2013